I think I’m making myself sick with fear. I haven’t even had any coffee, and I’m already nauseous.
I have one court summons that says my arraignment is on Feb 10 at 8:30am and then a second on that says Feb 10 at 9:00am. then I also have telephone hearing on Feb 11 at 8:30am. wut? none of that makes any sense. if I’m reading this correctly, that means my hearing is AFTER my arraignment — of which I have TWO different ones??
once I have access to the work scanner, I’ll be scanning these three documents and emailing them to my beau’s dad (who’s a federal judge) and asking him wtf is going on.
I’ll be calling the Public Defender’s office today to see if they have an appointment set up for me to meet with someone and discuss the involvement of that medication.
to him, I’ll also present my rehab completion paperwork and my AA meeting attendance form.
I’m almost positive I’ll have 60+ hours of community service, will have to take a $75-150 driving course (last time was two two-hour sessions), and will have to take a $200+ drug abuse course (last time was only a single three-hour session). they’ll also be a wallop of fees, I’m sure.
but it’s the possible prison time about which I’m worried. depending on the severity of punishment the judge chooses, he has the option of sticking me away for six months.
if that were to happen, I’m sure I’d lose my job. and I bet I’d lose Brian too. Zero will have lived with the parents for so long that he would have forgotten all about me. and unless something miraculous happens to me in jail, I’m sure I’d kill myself if I came home to those results.
I’m trying to find the positives.
all I’ve come up with is that if I do go to prison, I’ll have a lot more time to read.
but honestly, I’m near crying at this point. I’m shaking. I’m terrified.
yet I can’t fall apart. I have too much to do today. I can’t break down at work. I just can’t.