random check-in

I finally caught up on comments to my posts.  I’m still going through all of y’all’s posts.

it seems I still have readers over at my LiveJournal.  so I may start posting over there again.  I’m getting emails again when my ElJay friends post, so that’s something.  ElJay was just so limiting, ya know?  but hey, it’s free, and it was what was available to me a million years ago.

ugh.  I’m just not feel it today.  I don’t give a shit about anything.  I don’t care about doing my job well, as I usually do.  I don’t care about how I look or feel, other than trying to care about the not-caring.  I’m not sure if I’m hungry, though I usually start to get so around this time.

I’m rekindling one of my favourite friendships — Dave.  he’s a freakin’ character, y’all.  anyway, he randomly messaged me about a week ago, and now we’re messaging almost everyday and have Skyped twice.  he’s super laissez-faire, just great fun.  he’s a supporter of some my “bad habits” (smokes. drinks. etc.), but he’s very healthy about them and guides me through proper methods of enjoying them.

he’s also my camping buddy.  I remember the first time I went to his place.  a fair bit of land, and a large pond.  there was an old pirogue (a cajun canoe) on the water, and he mentioned taking me out in it.  and I asked if there were two so we could both paddle.  he said there was only the one, then mentioned how maybe he should paddle alone.  I assertively informed him that I a master canoer and would be fine.  so we both get in.  and I just take over steering — apparently enough so and with sufficient skill that I thoroughly impressed him.  lol.  a year or so later, we would become river buddies, kayaking down various waters together.

kayaking.  I miss it.  it’s been too long since I’ve paddled.  hell, I would even take flat water right now.  just, anything.  and sun.  and warmth.  and creatures (bugs, birds, anything).

I have another post I plan to write more about that.  today’s was just to pump by blog back up on your reading list.  🙂

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the skill of charisma

I think it’s really unfortunate how we’re not taught how to stremgthen pur charisma in school or daycare. we learn how to play nice and not misbehave. but we’re not instructed on how to really sell yourself, unless ypu actively seek out a business class of sorts. various scouts are good about providing these lessons. but not everyone is in such a program.

I swear my charisma is what got me my new job. I uncoothly inquired, albeit on topic and well-time, how many people applied to the position. they received over thirty resumes, twently of which were actually viable. the first rpund of interviews included twelve applicants. the second round was five. and then this cheese stood alone. I know there must have been at least a few of those folks who had the proper qualifications. as such, I am firmly convinced my charisma is what sold me to them. (to be fair, my charisma is badass.)

but for every job or opportunity I get as a result of my charisma, that’s one person who was more qualified or deserving of something who is going to have to go without.I feel a little guilty, honestly. butat the same time, charisma is a skill just like so many others that these jobs need to take into account. but still….

How to Wear Pink, Like a Man

I looooove The Art of Manliness.  since I was in middle school, I wanted to be a knight or prince.  I didn’t want to be the damsel; I wanted to rescue her.

“I want to be a prince, not a princess!  I don’t want to be protected!  When I’m a prince, I’ll do the protecting!”
~ Utena Tenjou, Revolutionary Girl Utena

I distinctly remember the moment when I realised this:  I was on the bus on a school field trip.  the coolest girl of the grade was usually a horrid bitch to me (I was of the lowest social rank in that school).  but when she wasn’t around her friends, she was really sweet to and very friendly with me.  at this given moment on the bus, her friends were elsewhere.  so she and I started talking.  I can see very clearly when I said something that made her laugh.  her smile was beautiful.  she grinned shyly and pushed her red hair behind her ears.  the sun bounced off her freckles, adding to the rosiness of her cheeks.  it was beautiful.  I decided in that moment, I wanted to make all girls smile like that.  I wanted to be the cause of all the happiness in these flowers.

anyway, that’s material for a separate post.  this one is about a piece by The Art of Manliness.  their most recent blog post is “How to Wear Pink, Like a Man“.  you can follow the link to read it at its original location, or you can go ahead on below.

“I guess, in the end, I couldn’t be a prince.  Forgive me, Anthy, for pretending to be a prince.”
~ Utena Tenjou, Revolutionary Girl Utena

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